Various days of what the heck
by ReveredMage
Summary: Here are just a bunch of stupid, various events that happen to Jay thanks to certain people he spends his time with.


---

**Okay, so, I ended up writing this a while back as one of those "what the heck" drabble things I tend to write up, and then forget about. I'd already shown this to Mandeh/Harmony283 a while ago (And she gave **_**the best**_** comment to this – hopefully it'll end up happening again)**

**So if I ever update again, it'd most likely be another drabble because I don't have the time to commit to a full story. **

**Anyways. Hopefully this isn't to 'what the heck'. It's just random, weird ideas that randomly hit me and then I end up writing, well, stuff like this.**

**Drabble start.**

---

A meeting. It was just a simple meeting.

...but why was he wearing a skirt of all things? Because people are stupid, that's why.

--Yesterday--

"C'mon JJ! I've seen how you've been looking at it!" Norma sang, nearly dancing across her room, a dress in her hands. "If ya wanna try it on, just ask! It's not like anyone'll question you because you already look feminine enough already."

Shirley stifled a giggle behind a hand from her seat on the bed

"See? Even Shirl thinks it's a good idea! And I'm sure Senny, and Teach, and C would agree as well!" Norma leaned in close, nudging her nose against Jay's.

"..give me a good reason why I shouldn't kill you." Jay spoke after a moment of silence, fists trembling in a controlled anger, cheeks tinted pink. Before he was forced into the room, Norma has _somehow_ managed to slip his weapons out of his pockets and put them god-knows-where; and the chance of her selling them was rather high.

" 'cause this is the perfect chance for me to set you up with Red." Norma grinned after a moment, straightening up the flowers in a near by vase. "Red or yellow?"

"What – red." Jay blinked, blurting out an answer. "Besides, how many times have I told you, I don't –"

"JJ, if I had 100 gald for every time you blushed while saying, no, even _thinking_ that, I'd be rich." Norma waves a hand dismissively at Jay, plucking out a red flower from the vase. "Okay Shirl, it's time to work on JJ's hair!"

"I'm already on it." Shirley answered, inching over on the bed to where Jay sat on a near by chair, whose hands were tightly clenching the wood in annoyance. "I'm just going to let your hair down, aright?"

A slight smile escapes from his tightly pressed lips. "Would you even listen if I refused?"

"Well...no." She answered with an innocent smile, removing the hair ties.

"Wow JJ, I didn't realize how long your hair was." Norma let out a low whistle.

"There is a reason why I wear it up." He answered with a scowl.

"Oh well, it's really gonna win Red over when we're done, right Shirl?" Norma grinned at her.

"Well…I'm sure you'll really catch his attention." Shirley smiled, continuing to brush his hair.

"Hey, will you watch it?" Jay cringed. "I'd much rather you _not_ rip my hair out."

A moment's pause occurred before Norma was across the room, rummaging through various articles of clothing. "Hey JJ?"

Silence before a reluctant answer. "Yes?"

"Red or yellow?"

--Present--

If this didn't kill him, then he didn't know what would. Jay frowned, the hundredth scowl escaping his lips while he tugged down on the barely appropriate red skirt, which if it were any shorter, would show the frilly pink underwear Norma had forced him to wear. Though at least she had the decency to give him a black long sleeved, off the shoulder button up shirt…though it exposed a lot more skin than Jay would have liked – the only other thing she gave him to wear were white running shoes and black ankle socks.

For someone who was generally unseen, Jay was feeling rather…seen.

"Dammit Norma, I'm going to kill you." Jay scowled under his breath, shooting a death glare back in the direction of the inn. He pushed his loose hair back, fingers brushing against the red flower Norma had oh so helpfully pinned there, ears burning whenever someone, mainly male, cast him a glance. Thankfully though, it was getting dark and there were few people out and about.

Damn the girl to a thousand painful deaths for putting him through this.

He was at the edge of the river where someone he would have rather not be seen by was waiting.

A dry twig snapped under his foot. "Dammit." He hissed beneath his breath.

"Jay?" Moses spun around, staring blankly at him for a moment. "I know Bubbles said that y'had somethin' t'show me, but I wasn't expecting this flamboyant mess. …t'hell are y'wearin' that for?"

"Finally, a smart question." Jay let out an annoyed sigh, tugging down on the skirt again. "Apparently I have to wear this while I…tell you something." His eyes narrowed into slits, hands balling into fists.

"Oh, do ya?" Moses tilted his head, an inquiring expression spread across his face.

"Obviously, or else I wouldn't be here dressed like this." Eyes turned into daggers while he stepped closer, hands still tugging down on the skirt.

Moses waited until he was inches away before a grin spread across his face. "Now darlin', did ya have t'say somethin' alone the lines of…" He took either side of Jay's face in his hands, placing a firm kiss on his lips.

Moments passed before a flash and then click sounded, soon followed by an all too familiar voice. "Okay Red, that's long enough! Mission _acquire blackmail_ success!"

"Got-cha!" Moses beamed, tweaking Jay's nose before walking to meet up with Norma. "Ha-ha, that was great!"

"Do you mean to tell me that…" The corner of Jay's mouth twitched, shoulders trembling in rage.

"We set you up? You got it JJ!" Norma laughed, patting the camera hanging around her neck. "Good luck explaining this to everyone!"

"But…but…" Jay's mouth moved, trying to form a coherent sentence. "Shouldn't this count as blackmail to the idiot as well?"

"JJ this won't affect Red in any way what-so-ever." Norma grinned.

"And why not?" Another twitch.

"If ya didn't realize that I've been into ya fer months now, then I really think your brain may be just a tad bit broken." Moses chuckled before patting Norma's shoulder. "C'mon Bubbles, Shirley's waitin' fer us so we can publish the pictures. See ya later Jay!"

"'night JJ!" Norma grinned, holding back a laugh. "Better hope we decide to be nice to you."

"I-idiots." Jay muttered when he was alone, hands trembling in a silent rage.

The reason was faulty, but the kiss was definitely real on both ends.


End file.
